THE THIRTY MILE ZONE

Los Angeles, CA

(April 8, 2012)

We woke up on day two in Los Angeles to discover that the Easter Bunny had paid us a visit! Yay! Well, in truth, Miriam, the ever-prepared wonder, thought ahead and brought delicious chocolates from our favorite chocolatier in NYC, Jacques Torres, with a couple of traditional Hershey’s and Dove chocolate bunnies thrown in. The little sneak got up in the middle of the night to hide chocolate Easter eggs all over Sal’s apartment, and Sal and I, still dressed in our PJs, had fun finding them all on Easter morning. 

This day was going to be loads of fun, starting off with brunch with Sal and one of Miriam’s oldest friends, Rightor. Miriam and I, having watched a lot of TMZ, a paparazzi/entertainment based news program, wanted to hit up a brunch place often featured on the program called Toast, located in Hollywood. Apparently, it’s frequented a lot by celebrities. I wanted to go there, not for the possible celebrity sightings, but because I had seen it so often on TMZ that I had to check it out. 

Sal & the tea bag selections

Rightor & his coffee

Sal dropped us off and went to park the car, and we started catching up with Rightor while our table was prepared. Miriam and Rightor grew up together in New Orleans, and for a while we all lived in New York, but very recently, a television series he’s been writing garnered the interest of a major producer in LA, so he has “temporarily” relocated to LA to write more episodes in the hopes that a studio will pick it up. We’ll see how temporary that move is…
The brunch menu at Toast looked AMAZING! We all had a difficult time deciding what to get. Miriam and I settled on something sweet (pancakes and French toast covered and stuffed with all sorts of goodness), Rightor on something savory, and Sal, the skinny snot, couldn't decide, so he ate two meals to get a sweet AND savory fix!

My chai came with cookies!

We had a blast over brunch, chatting as though it hadn’t been a millennium since we’d last seen each other. We had a lot of laughs and a lot of fun, and I think we highly amused our waitress.

Once brunch was over, we said goodbye to Rightor, and Sal dropped us off on Hollywood Boulevard by the Grauman’s Chinese Theater (also know as Mann’s Chinese Theater). Miriam and I were going on the TMZ Hollywood tour, and we couldn’t have been more excited about it!

We got there a bit early for our tour, so we checked in at the tour booth and then played around with all the famous hand and foot prints that are pressed into the cement outside the Chinese Theater. As a tourist, you can’t have a real Hollywood visit without testing your hand and foot size against those of some of the most famous music and screen legends. At the same time, I can’t even imagine what has been in those handprints we were all so willingly touching…if you’re squeamish, bring some hand sanitizer.

Miriam matching up with Cher

Finally, someone with bigger hands than me! (Arnold Schwarzenegger)

AKA, my mom's side of the family

We also took some pictures of the Hollywood Walk of Fame, the many blocks of stars gracing the sidewalks around Hollywood Boulevard that idolize celebrities from musicians to television personalities, all the while trying to avoid the costumed characters wanting to take pictures with you for money. No, thanks.

Finally, it was time to join our tour!

Here’s a little back-story: TMZ is an entertainment news source, using both a website and a television show to promote the news of the entertainment world. Their television show takes place at their morning pitch meetings, where the TMZ employees pitch their stories to Harvey Levin, the creator of TMZ, in the hopes of getting the stories posted on the website. I absolutely LOVE watching these morning pitch meetings. They are ridiculous and hilarious. Personally, I could care less about the videos and pictures they get of the various celebrities-- I’m more interested in watching the camaraderie of the employees. I find it so entertaining that I actually DVR it so I can make sure to watch it every day.

Anyways, TMZ stands for “Thirty Mile Zone,” a term from the 1960’s, which meant that any film shooting outside this zone was considered a location shoot-- location shoots require per diems and paid travel and living expenses, so to film within this thirty mile zone was cost effective and ideal for producers. The Thirty Mile Zone basically sits on top of the center of Hollywood. Harvey Levin thought it would be a fun throwback to name his entertainment news website after the Thirty Mile Zone, since a lot of their news comes from, but it’s not limited to, Hollywood.

So, Miriam and I were super pumped to be going on the relatively new TMZ Hollywood tour (it was less than a year old when we went). It’s different from your typical sight-seeing tours because the tour guides are TMZ employees and could even be one of the people you see on the television show, and rather than point out the expected LA sights, they point out where celebrity happenings have occurred (i.e. the corner where Hugh Grant picked up the prostitute or the Laugh Factory where Michael “Kramer” Richards had his racial rant), all while scoping for celebrities. 

Van!

We were really hoping our tour guide would be Van, the young black guy from Louisiana often featured on the show. We were so hoping it would be him that we decked ourselves out in New Orleans and Saints t-shirts. And wouldn’t you know, our tour guide was Van! 

We let him know right away that we were going to be a fun pair, but it looked like the rest of the people on the bus were going to be quiet and unresponsive. I decided right then and there to make up for that. I was joking with him and trying to give clever answers to his questions and even tried to get the other people on the bus involved. They were boring. But at least I was entertaining myself and Van. Miriam just shook her head and laughed at me.

The tour is in a big, open-air van. Well, bigger than a van but smaller than a full-sized bus. It has a roof but no windows, just giant open spaces that we could hang out of if we felt adventurous—ah, the glories of living in a desert without the real worry of rain. We could see everything around us without the hindrance of windows but still kind of be out of the sun. That was sweet.

Our friend Lori had gone on the TMZ tour the month prior so she let us know that they’d ask for volunteers for games along the way, with the potential to win a free t-shirt. Well, I wanted that t-shirt. The minute Van started saying the word “volun-” my hand shot up in the air. The game I played was whether or not the celebrity in the video would wave at the camera or give the finger. The whole bus thought my celebrity would give the finger, but I said he would wave. And guess who was right? That’s right, baby. I’m the proud owner of a TMZ Hollywood tour t-shirt. Boo-yah. I won’t tell you who my celebrity was in case you, reader, end up on this tour and happen to get the same celebrity video. No cheating!

We ended up playing the game twice more and both contestants got it wrong, so in an effort to give away his last t-shirt, Van asked everyone where he was originally from. I was the first to answer, but since I already had a t-shirt I couldn’t win again.

The tour cracked Miriam and I up. We stopped by all sorts of crazy places, including the hospital where celebrities are born, go crazy, and die, the Hollywood precinct, which has a special rule in place where they won’t release mug shots (celebrities, if they are going to be arrested, hope to be in the Hollywood precinct at the time of their arrest…), various restaurants celebrities frequent when they want to be seen (like Boa), and an apartment building with some very famous inhabitants (like Elton John, for instance, who has a separate apartment for his baby…because the baby can take care of itself, right?).

Surprise carrot cake!

Van, who was mic’ed the whole time, would start up conversations with people on the street or in the cars next to us when we were stuck in traffic. At one point he started up a conversation with the couple in the car next to us, asking what they were doing for their Easter Sunday, at which point the lady lifted an unexpected carrot cake from her lap! WTF?! Where did that come from?? We had fun with that one. 

We only had one brief celebrity sighting—Wayne Brady—as he waited to be seated at a brunch place Van was pointing out to us. Van then told us how he has some bad blood for Wayne Brady after Wayne’s production company optioned his screenplay about Hurricane Katrina and then never did anything with it. It’s what brought Van to LA in the first place. He may be slightly bitter about it, but he’s now a celebrity in his own right. Shoot, the guy was invited into the back of Cee-Lo’s limo when they both showed up at the same fast food joint. Cee-Lo recognized him from TMZ and asked him to join him in his car! He said it was wild eating his value combo in Cee-Lo Green’s limo. Pretty funny stuff.

One of my favorite moments was when we passed by the Chinese Theater (remember the costumed characters I mentioned earlier?). On the count of three he had us all say hi to Spongebob, who happily turned toward our bus and waved. Then Van had us watch a video where that very Spongebob got beat up by two women who thought he said something disparaging about one of their mothers. It was the perfect set up. We were so happy and then completely mortified. It was hilarious! Trust me, it was hilarious.

Then, sadly, the tour came to an end. We, happily, gave Van a nice tip (always tip your tour guides!) for the very entertaining tour we took and asked him to take a picture with us outside the tour bus. My reaction to the picture (“Sweet, wounded...That’s beautiful.”) sent him into hysterics, at which point he hugged us both and told us he loved us. Aw.

After the tour, we ventured into various shops along Hollywood Boulevard until Sal could come pick us up, then we all went to the West Hollywood It’s a Wrap (yes, again) since Miriam and I only had 15 minutes there the day before. Sal had never been and really wanted to check it out.

I totally scored at this It’s a Wrap, finding two perfectly fitting pairs of dress pants from the television show “Brothers and Sisters” and the Adam Sandler movie Jack and Jill. I also found a really nice dress shirt for my brother (it was his birthday in a week, after all), and a pair of stainless steel hoop earrings from the Selena Gomez television show “Wizards of Waverly Place” that only cost 90 cents. 90 cents! Total steal.

My fried burrito

The fun cactus chandelier

After we drained It’s a Wrap dry, we headed back to Sal’s apartment to freshen up, randomly running into a friend of his driving by and convincing her to chat for a second in a convenient parking lot-- LA really is a small town sometimes! Then we met up with Sal’s friend, Isabella, for dinner at the Mexican restaurant Don Cuco, where I got an amazing fried burrito. Dinner was a blast and Isabella was so much fun.

By the end of the evening we were so tuckered out by our long and eventful day that we couldn’t wait to pass out...but not before having some Easter Bunny chocolate...

Sal, Isabella, and Miriam outside Don Cuco's

THE HIDDEN (AND NOT SO HIDDEN) GEMS OF NEW YORK CITY

New York, NY

Since summer is fully upon us, I thought I would take a break from trying to catch up on my LA blogging and let readers in on a few fabulous and fun things to do in New York City during the summer months. And most of these things are only available during the summer, so get out there and enjoy!

LIVE-IN THEATER

Various Locations.

Last year, at the end of the summer season, Miriam and I won tickets to an interactive murder mystery called The Ryan Case: 1873, put on by Live-In Theater. We went as a joke, not knowing what to expect, but preparing for it to be laughable. Instead, we had an amazing and fun experience!

Live-In Theater takes real, true, unsolved New York City murder mysteries and sets them on the streets of New York. We were told to arrive at a bar in Chinatown at which point we were directed to a cabaret space in the basement. Once the audience was assembled, a big, burly 19^th century police officer got on stage to “brief us” on the case. He told us the police department was too corrupt to solve the crime and he was enlisting us to help solve the case. Our case was the story of the Ryan siblings, a brother and sister murdered in their tenement building in 1873. We were told about the suspects and possible witnesses and then split up into groups and handed notepads, pencils, and a map.

It was our task to follow the map and look for the suspects in the pictures we were shown or for people to interview. The characters were spread out over a number of blocks in Chinatown—all dressed in 19^th century garb. You would think it would be easy to distinguish them from the other Chinatown inhabitants, but one of the out-of-towners in my group insisted that a homeless man was one of the characters. I kept trying to explain that there was no way they had rolling, carry-on luggage in 1873…

Once we found a character, we interviewed them to get information out of them. It was very Law & Order/CSI. We all felt like we were really trying to solve a crime.

Once we had met all the characters, we headed back to the bar, and tried to come up with a murderer and a motive. All the characters came out on stage for one last round of questioning, and then all the groups announced who they thought was the murderer and what the motive might have been.

It was a LOT of fun, I must say, especially since I was expecting it to be a giant joke. It’s an unsolved mystery, so I wouldn’t be surprised if they change the murderer and motive from show to show to keep it a surprise for guests.

Live-In Theater provides a few different interactive murder mysteries. Check out their website (click here) and see one of their shows! At the moment they only offer shows during the summer, since they take place outside, but it looks like they are lining up a new show in the fall.

IMPERIAL WOODPECKER SNO-BALLS

124 MacDougal Street between West 3^rd Street and Bleeker Street in the West Village.

Sno-ball with sweetened condensed milk

I’m sure most of you have tried a sno-cone, or even a piragua (shaved ice), but unless you’ve been to New Orleans, it’s very rare that you’ve had the chance to try a sno-ball. 

Sno-balls are in the same vein as sno-cones and piraguas in that they are crushed ice with your choice of flavored syrup poured over the top of it, but what makes sno-balls so special is the ice. It’s crushed so fine that it resembles actual snow.

The owner of Imperial Woodpecker Sno-Balls, Neesa, grew up in the south and learned from some of the best sno-ballers in New Orleans, so she knows her stuff. Think Plum Street Sno-Balls, for those of you who have visited the quintessential sno-ball establishment in New Orleans-- she learned from them. Yummy.

The ice is crushed and put in Chinese take-out containers, just like they do in NOLA. Then, the syrup of your choice is poured all over it and you have the option of adding additional toppings, like sweetened condensed milk or ice cream, for example. I’m a personal fan of sweetened condensed milk, especially on top of a strawberry shortcake flavored sno-ball!

Imperial Woodpecker is a seasonal place, so you must check this place out during the summer months. Our goal this summer is to try all their flavors-- we have a lot of work ahead of us!

All the flavors at Imperial Woodpecker

STREET FAIRS

Various locations.

New Yorkers are well aware of summer street fairs, but I don’t know many who know when and where you can expect to find a street fair on any given weekend.

Throughout the summer, street blocks all over the city are cordoned off and vendors set up shop, selling their wares and delicious street fair foods. Expect to get candied apples, corn on the cob straight off the grill, fresh lemonade, arepas (my absolute favorite: two cornbread pancakes with mozzarella cheese melted between them), scarves, souvenirs, clothing, jewelry-- you name it, you’ll probably find it at a street fair.

Some of the street fairs will even have entertainment, complete with a giant stage and everything. It’s certainly a fun walk. Grab a bite to eat while perusing the various stalls. 

Click here for a schedule of this summer’s street fairs.

BROADWAY IN BRYANT PARK AND CENTRAL PARK

6th Avenue between 40th and 42nd Streets & Central Park West and 63rd Street

Have your Thursday lunch hours free and want to see some Broadway stars for free? Head to the parks!

Starting in April and running through August, the Broadway Show Softball League hits up Heckscher ball fields in Central Park (by Central Park West and 63rd Street). It started out in the 1950’s as an informal way for the cast and crews of various Broadway shows to get together, picnic, and play a little ball, and it’s turned into quite the competition. Teams are comprised of cast, crew, and front of house staff from a number of Broadway shows and industry agencies. They offer three division time slots: 11:30, 1:30, and 3:30. The first two are heavily dominated by the Broadway shows, while the last time slot is mainly theater companies and unions, since the actors have to get ready for their evening performances. 

You never know who you’ll see out there. Sometimes the celebrity star power of a show will come out to support the team, other times they may actually play, which was the case with Nick Jonas before How to Succeed In Business Without Really Trying closed. Every Thursday he was out playing with his team. Miriam, who plays in the league, actually played against his team. Nick Jonas was covering third base. She hit a triple. She likes to say she got to third base with Nick Jonas...

Stop by the park and take in a game of softball. It’s a great way to while away an afternoon. 

Or, if you’re interested in hearing some great music from off-Broadway and Broadway shows, head to Bryant Park at 6th Avenue between 40th and 42nd Streets on Thursdays from 12:30-1:30pm, where four or five different shows every week bring out their cast members and perform a few numbers. Broadway in Bryant Park starts in July and runs through August. You can also enter to win free Broadway tickets for an entire year through the Resorts World Casino New York City tent.

Check it out! Maybe you’ll discover a show to add to your must-see list.

NYC PUBLIC POOLS

Various locations.

When I first moved to New York City 12 years ago, the idea of going to a public pool really skeeved me out. It took eight really hot summers to help me get over that, and I’ve never looked back. I’ve found a number of New Yorkers don’t go to the public pools simply because they have misconceptions about them, so I’m here to enlighten you all.

First of all, the NYC outdoor public pools are FREE! Indoor pools require a membership fee, but the outdoor pools are open to the public. The outdoor pools coincide with the NYC public schools’ summer break, so they open at the tail end of June and remain open through Labor Day.

The pools are open daily, weather permitting, from 11am-7pm, closing for one hour from 3-4 in order to clean and give the lifeguards a break. The pools are open rain or shine, but once lighting and thunder get involved, they shut it down. Personally, I love going to the pool on rainy days because I practically have the whole pool to myself!

The public pools offer many different programs, including those to learn to swim at any age, Early Bird and Night Owl Adult Lap Swimming, in which adults can swim laps prior to the pool opening and after closing, without the general swimmers getting in the way. Many of the pools even offer a separate lap swimming area for those focused swimmers.

There are many rules to keep in mind before going to a public pool, so make sure to read up on the rules here beforehand.

The big rules are: everyone needs to have a strong lock (luggage locks are not allowed), no electronics are allowed by the pool area (so no phones, iPods, e-readers, or cameras), no food or drink, all men’s swim trunks must have netting, and any clothes (other than swimsuits) worn on the pool deck must be white.

Basically, you can bring your towel, a bottle of water, sunscreen/suntan lotion, sunglasses, a hat or visor, and a book (as well as goggles, ear plugs, swim caps, and nose plugs, of course).

When the public pool opens, it’s the best part of my summer. I look forward to it every season. It’s the perfect free option for a hot summer day. 

Get thee to a pool this summer! Maybe I’ll see you there.

IT'S A WRAP

Los Angeles, CA
(April 7, 2012)

We woke up relatively early on our first official day in Los Angeles, partly because we were still on New York time so our brains believed it was three hours later, and partly because we scheduled brunch plans with a friend of ours.

We got ourselves ready, waved goodbye to Sal as he headed off to work at Soul Cycle, a popular New York-based spinning studio, and headed out to Hollywood to meet our friend Lori.

Lori was originally a friend of Miriam’s sister, Beth, but because of our mutual interest in show business, we three had become close, so it was a no-brainer to meet up with her during our stay in LA.

We agreed to meet at The Hudson, a bar/eatery in Hollywood and, conveniently, walking distance from Lori’s apartment. Well, walking distance for a girl like Lori who used to live in Boston and walked everywhere-- a proper LA person would NEVER walk anywhere, or so she told us. Side note: We also, amusingly, discovered how unwilling people are to travel from neighborhood to neighborhood, especially our NYC friends who should have been used to a lot of travel time getting from place to place, but, no, having to travel over 20 minutes somewhere was a bit out of everyone’s comfort zone. That amused us.

Anyway, we, luckily, found street parking right outside the restaurant, went inside, and found Lori waiting for us at a table. Everything on the menu looked delicious, but we were so busy catching up that it took us a while to place our order. Near the end of the meal, Lori pointed out that the restaurant was actually built up around a couple of 50-foot -plus trees, meaning that, literally, there were trees growing in the restaurant. How in the world did we miss that?? Especially the giant tree. Across. From. Our. Table. Doh!

Lori, Miriam, me, and the tree

Our meal came to an end but we weren’t ready to say goodbye to Lori just yet, so we kidnapped her. Obviously. Actually, it was pretty easy to convince her to come with us. All we had to do was tell her we were on our way to a shop in Burbank called It’s a Wrap, a consignment shop used by the movie/television studios. Everything in the shop was purchased for and/or used in television shows and films, and each item has a tag with a code telling for which studio or, more specifically, which show it was purchased. Once the studios no longer need the costume item, they sell it to It's a Wrap on consignment, and people like us can purchase them for cheap and then have the honor of saying, "These pants were used in [insert movie title here]."

We were having a field day perusing the merchandise and figuring out the various codes. I ended up finding a steal of a deal! A Zara trench coat used in “General Hospital”, originally retailing for $200, was on “winter” clearance (because in LA, a spring trench coat is considered a winter coat...*ahem*) for $30! A ridiculous steal! I was super excited because I had been looking for a cute spring trench coat, and this one practically fell in my lap!
We finally exhausted ourselves and made our purchases. I ended up scoring not only the trench coat but also a scarf for my mom from the short-lived television show “Detroit 1-8-7” and a beautiful tie for my brother from the reincarnated television show “Melrose Place”. Miriam walked away with a cute summer dress from the Warner Bros. Studio, stellar earrings used in The Green Hornet, and amazing, sparkling black heels from 21 Jump Street. I can’t remember at all what Lori ended up getting, but we were all really happy with our purchases.

Bob Odenkirk

After dropping Lori off at her apartment, we headed down to Sunset Boulevard to hit up my favorite—and the world’s largest—independent music shop in the world, Amoeba Music. We originally discovered Amoeba Music when visiting San Francisco in 2006, and when we drove down to LA later that same trip, we made sure to visit their Hollywood store. It’s a huge warehouse-sized store with new and used CDs, DVDs, LPs, and memorabilia. On my last visit I found a very hard to find import title by one of my favorite artists, Keri Noble, for über cheap (plus a ton of other music that filled up a good portion of my carry-on luggage…). This time around we searched for all our favorite artists, couldn’t find anything we didn’t already have, and headed to the classical and musicals sections instead. Jackpot! We loaded up on a bunch of used operas and musicals, and I even found the recording for Cirque du Soleil’s Wintuk—which is only available through Cirque—for one-third the price. Woo hoo!
At this point a charity auction started up at the store’s main podium, led by comedian/actor Bob Odenkirk, so we amused ourselves for a while listening to him auction off crazy and stupid things. It was fun. Then it was time to check out, and the cashier loaded us up with free bumper stickers, magnets, and hipster pins. We were golden!

The mural outside the building.

Going to In-n-Out Burger is required when visiting LA…or so we like to believe. Our appetites being ravenous, we decided to get the required visit out of the way and searched for any In-n-Out Burgers in the area. Our search pulled up a plethora of In-n-Outs to choose from—you could practically throw a rock and hit three at once. So we picked the easiest one to get to and had one heck of a time trying to park in their ridiculously built parking lot (you would think a city filled with drivers would have better parking lots...you would be wrong). The place was crazy crowded, but we managed to snag a table and enjoyed our quick bite to eat.

                

Inside Aroma

Having nothing else planned that afternoon, we decided to hit up the other It’s a Wrap store, located in West Hollywood. It was farther than we anticipated, so we only had 15 minutes to look around before they closed, but I was able to find a brand-spanking-new Drew Brees Saints jersey for Miriam for only $9 from the Warner Bros. Studio—it still had the tags on it! Then we hit up a nearby Target to get a few things we needed for our stay and headed back to Sal’s apartment in the not-so-bad rush hour traffic.

Back at Sal’s apartment we freshened up and prepared to meet up with my little cousin, Autumn, who moved out to LA right after she graduated from high school a few years ago. We rarely get to see each other anymore—it’s rare that we’re all at home in WI at the same time—so it was a nice treat to be able to see her on our trip.
We met at one of her favorite hang-outs in Burbank called Aroma Coffee & Tea Company, a cute little café offering a wide variety of teas and coffees, as well as amazing looking desserts and a fabulous array of savory dishes. Miriam and I settled on a fresh hummus platter and a beautiful salad, and the three of us grabbed a table in Aroma’s ultra-cute backyard, where we chatted about life and waxed philosophical before we all started getting tired.
After saying our goodbyes, we headed back to Sal’s, camped out in his living room chatting, and then hit the hay. We had a big day on the morrow-- a TMZ tour awaited us!

Me with my cousin Autumn

My favorite table at Aroma

LOSING OUR VIRGIN AMERICA VIRGINITY

(April 6 & 7, 2012)

I had been rehearsing for Damn Yankees! for two months, and it was high time for a vacation. Recently we’ve had a large number of friends move to Los Angeles, and we hadn’t been to LA in six years, so we figured it was a good time to hit up the West Coast.

We were getting nervous during the planning stage because the time we were going was Passover/Easter/Spring Break, which meant flights were escalating in price. Not cool for people who like to travel on a budget. Then luck befell us, and Virgin America had a fabulous sale. Awesome! We’ve always wanted to travel Virgin—their commercials are fun, you can order food directly to your seat through your personal TV, and they have pink and purple mood lighting. What?! Crazy talk. And we wanted it.

Our plan was to be there just shy of a week, staying with our friend Sal, one of the NYC escapees, who lives in North Hollywood. Our hope was to visit as many of our friends as possible whilst still having a banging time hitting up all the fun spots in LA.

I had been so overwhelmed with rehearsals that this was the first trip in a long time where I didn’t plan a thing. I threw caution to the wind and figured we would find things to do once we got there. Miriam found a good car rental through Budget, and, instead of renting a GPS (for almost the same price we paid for the car, mind you), we opted to finally (!!) upgrade to the much-coveted iPhone and download a free GPS app. A much better idea!

I grabbed the maps and my DK Top 10 Los Angeles guide book (seriously my favorite guide books—I get them for every city I travel to) from six years ago and just crossed my fingers that everything was relatively the same.

We had an 8pm departure out of JFK on Friday, so we sauntered there after I finished work. “Sauntered” because we were already checked in, weren’t checking any bags, and would have two hours to get through security once we arrived at the airport.

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: For some reason Virgin America flies out of the international terminal at JFK. Almost all international flights out of JFK seem to leave at the same time. The international terminal is currently under construction, so all passengers have to go through one tiny security gate. If you have an evening flight out of the international terminal at JFK, be prepared for a loooooooong wait.

The gates/security are a level below the departures/check-in area, so while we were making our way to an elevator, I noticed from the check-in balcony a peculiarly long line way off in the distance. I shrugged it off, and Miriam and I talked of grabbing a bite to eat before going through security. Upon getting to the bottom level, we decided we’d skip dinner and just head to the gate. That’s when we truly noticed the security line. It stretched for as far as we could see and then some. As we started walking towards the back of the line (and walking…and walking…and walking), our jaws started to drop. This wait was going to be interminable.

A half hour had crept by slowly, as had our place in line, and we started playing a fun game of watching unaware passengers happily walk past us on their way to the gate and betting on whether or not we’d see them walking past us again—this time to the back of the line. We very rarely lost that game. And those passengers were no longer happily walking past us…

By the time we finally made it into the roped off section of the security line, which meant the end was (kind of) in sight, we had only a half-hour until our flight was leaving. We were trying not to panic but the actual security part looked like utter chaos—there were a number of security agents checking passports and asking questions of every passenger, and then all these security lines converged into three security belts…which, in actuality, was a giant mob of frustrated people—and the belief we would actually make it through in time was dwindling.

Then a Virgin employee came through the line and pulled all of us on the looming LA flight to the “front” of the line—or as close as she could get us, which was about five people from where we were—and then, after the agents had checked our IDs and ushered us to the security scan part, she took every one of us and put us in the longest security line possible. All of us shook our heads at her stupidity, but at least we were all there together so they wouldn’t be leaving without us.

Luckily, our flight was right by the gate, and they were just beginning the boarding process as we arrived, so we climbed on board, happy to be able to sit down and relax. The ambiance was very cool. The purple lighting had a calming effect, which was beneficial to those who had just been through that horrendous security line (aka all of us), we all had personal televisions, and there were plugs at our seats (albeit tucked underneath the seats and hard to find) for all our electronics.

Miriam and I immediately perused the food menu located on our televisions, and a bunch of the food sounded really yummy, but we decided to hold off on ordering anything.

Once we took off there wasn’t a whole lot to watch that we didn’t have to pay for, and since it was such a late flight I decided to try to sleep some.

Here’s where I noticed another problem with Virgin. The aisles are so narrow that every time anybody—flight attendants included—walked passed my aisle seat, they hit me. Every. Time. Needless to say, sleeping was not so easy. It was a pretty active plane. Lots of free beverages and small bladders going around. Ugh.

Anyway, we landed at LAX a little after midnight (3am for our Eastern Standard Time brains…so we were exhausted), and then we waited a half-hour for the shuttle to take us to the rental car place. Talk about exasperating, especially when the other rental car places had shuttles continually passing by us. I guess that’s what you get for taking the cheapest rates… There were other New Yorkers waiting for the same shuttle, too, which turned into an interesting and entertaining time. Never keep a New Yorker waiting—one particular family did not hold back when the shuttle finally arrived.

We then had another half-hour wait for our rental car, since they only had two people working the counter that late at night, but eventually we got our cute little compact car, threw our stuff in the trunk, fired up the GPS, and went on our way.

We made it to our friend Sal’s place in North Hollywood and found him happily working on his computer in his living room. He gave us a quick tour of his place and informed us that we were to take his bed and he would sleep on the couch for the week. What?! We fought that one, but we lost the battle. Such a sweetie, that Sal.

He also introduced us to his prides and joys: Bubbles, Bop, and Fizz, his beloved fish.

By this point we three were exhausted and practically falling asleep on our feet, so off we went to bed. We had brunch plans in the morning, after all, and needed our beauty rest!

LITTLE BOXES ON A HILLSIDE

Dallas, TX
(January 27 – January 30, 2012)

My very first trip of the year had me traveling to Dallas, Texas, and I couldn’t get the Frank Loesser song “Big D” from The Most Happy Fella out of my head the entire time I was there.

Surprisingly, this was my first trip to Dallas. Surprising because a number of Miriam’s family members live there, including her sister and her family, and Miriam has traveled there a number of times. I’ve just never had the availability to join her. 

I mean, come on! There is a nephew down there who had already celebrated his first birthday, and I had never met him! But the real reason for the trip was Miriam: she was performing with the Lyric Stage in a concert version of Kismet, and there was no way I was going to miss it!

Now, before any of my Dallas-based friends freak out because I didn’t bother mentioning I was in town, it was a whirlwind of a trip. Three and a half days of family reunions, babies, a performance, and an “X” in the middle of the road. We’ll get to that in a moment…For now, let’s back up a bit.

Right after the New Year celebrations, Miriam flew down to Dallas to start her rehearsals, and I locked myself in my office/rehearsal space, madly trying to learn the score to Damn Yankees! (so many musical references and we’re only a few paragraphs in…hmm…). I took a job as a musical director with the community theater company I’ve performed with for a number of years and was trying to get my piano skills back up to snuff, so Miriam wasn’t too sad to leave me behind—she knew I’d be married to my piano for a few months.

I finally got to meet Teddy!

So, at the end of January, I boarded a plane and made my way to Big D. The first stop was Miriam’s sister’s house in Plano to see the kids, Edie and Teddy, and drop off the bags. I was running on very little sleep since we were casting Damn Yankees! until late Thursday night and I was on a 6am flight Friday morning. But I rallied and had fun squeezing the kids and catching up with the family members who were already there. 

My first impression of Dallas was this: flat deserts, freeways, lots of construction and strip malls. Sorry, Dallas. At one point, both Miriam’s mom and I started singing, “Little boxes on a hillside, little boxes made of ticky-tacky, little boxes on a hillside and they all look just the same.” Granted, I was staying in the suburban area of Plano, so I tried to cut it a little slack. 

Throughout my first day, the rest of Miriam’s family arrived and there were many happy reunions. Miriam had fun driving me around and pointing out the places where she hung out during her stay, and, come early evening, we got back in the car with her dad, drove to Irving, and dropped her off at the theater for her show (we were seeing the Saturday performances). The rest of us went back to her sister’s house and relaxed for the night.

Saturday was all a-buzz with intrigue. Miriam had planted a secret seed amongst her family that we were throwing her sister a surprise birthday party that afternoon, since her birthday was the following week. There’s nothing more fun than celebrating your birthday with almost all of your family-- it’s a rare treat these days with all of us spread out across the country.

We had our morning booked with various secret shopping excursions, and her sister was getting so frustrated with us because none of us wanted to go with her and her kids to a toddler’s birthday party that morning. She couldn’t understand why we would all travel to see them and not want to hang out. We had a good chuckle over that one.

As soon as she and her husband left the house, we were off! The first stop was to Costco to pick up the magnificent, multi-layered chocolate cake we had decorated the day before, as well as some fun munchies, then we went to a party supply store and stocked up on all our partying needs. Our last stop was Dickey’s Barbecue Pit, my first experience with the famous Dallas barbecue. I was excited. Unfortunately, we were taking it to go so I couldn't get the full experience, but it was still fun to be in there, and you got free ice cream with your purchase. This girl does not turn down free ice cream!

Fried okra, mac n cheese, and baked beans. Yummy!

                   

 

We then hightailed it home to set up everything before Beth arrived. They got done a little early, so her husband, Daniel, feigned sickness and stopped off at a gas station and lounged around in the bathroom for a while, spritzing his face with water for effect. It totally freaked Beth out-- she called, asking if she should take Daniel to the hospital. Again, we had a good chuckle. Soon, all the family had arrived and we were in position for Beth’s grand entrance. Needless to say, she was very surprised, and we had a fabulous time. 

After the party, we cleaned up and got ourselves ready for Miriam’s show that evening. The performance took place at the Lyric Stage in Irving, TX, a grand theater that puts on fully-staged and concert versions of classic musicals with a much-coveted full orchestra. Broadway producers these days seem to skimp on the size of the orchestra in order to save money, so to hear a full-sized orchestra is quite magical. Broadway producers: pay attention! We love our orchestras!

I had never seen Kismet other than the retched MGM movie musical from 1955, and I was pleasantly surprised by how beautiful the show is! It was a concert version, which means there were no sets, limited costumes, and very limited staging, but the music completely made up for that. Lyric Stage is part community theater and part professional theater. A lot of the ensemble is comprised of Dallas residents who love performing, while the lead characters are paid professionals. Miriam and the rest of the ensemble spent most of the time seated on risers, standing to sing, unless they had smaller ensemble pieces that allowed them to interact on the stage with the other characters. The music was glorious, and, again, the orchestra was fabulous! The leads had beautiful voices, and I was very impressed with all the ensemble singing. To be honest, the dancing was abhorrent-- that was the community theater aspect of it, I guess-- but on the whole it was a great production. 

Once the show was finished, Miriam and I waved good-bye to her family and friends and headed over to the producer’s home for a cast party. She introduced me to a number of her cast mates and I got in a long conversation with the music director; I told him about my new venture as a music director, and we chatted for a while on the beauty of community theater. People who do community theater do it for the fun of it, so their hearts are always in it. Professional actors do it for their jobs, so sometimes they forget the real reason they started doing theater in the first place. It’s so true. Community theater can be a really beautiful thing-- lots of heart!

Sunday morning turned out to be the only really free time Miriam and I would have to go see Dallas, so we woke up early and headed out to find the most famous spot in all of Dallas: where President John F. Kennedy was assassinated. It was a bit of a challenge to find, since we were lacking a GPS and the freeway exits we were told to use were all shut down for construction purposes (there was construction everywhere on the highways and freeways!), but eventually we made our way to downtown Dallas. 

A map of historical downtown Dallas

Our first stop was what some have deemed Founder’s Plaza, home to the replica of Dallas founder John Neely Bryan’s original log cabin. We were caught off guard by a homeless man sleeping on a wooden bench outside the log cabin. Apparently, he lost his key...  

Dealey Plaza and the library

Dealey Plaza

Next to this plaza is the Kennedy Memorial Plaza, which features an “open tomb” memorial, a large, open, rectangular, concrete fixture with no roof and only a slab of granite with John F. Kennedy’s name carved into it. It is said to represent the openness of JFK’s spirit.

The Old Red Museum

     

The grassy knoll

The "X" and the library

Then we took a short walk to Dealey Plaza, visited the various monuments, grabbed a cup of coffee at the memorial museum gift shop and cafe and then found the grassy knoll, made the obligatory grassy knoll jokes, and stood by the “X” in the middle of the road that marks the approximate location of where JFK was shot. There isn’t much there, but it’s still pretty powerful. Whilst standing by the “X” (when the traffic wasn’t coming by, of course) we glanced up to the Texas School Book Depository where Lee Harvey Oswald allegedly fired the weapon. I couldn’t help but replay the news footage in my head of the shooting. Pretty intense.

Once finished, it was time to try to find our way back to Plano, since we realized the return driving instructions had not been printed out for us. Thinking we would just go back the way we came, we headed out and started driving and driving...and driving. Finally, we conceded that we must be lost, since all civilization was slowly disappearing. We called Howard, one of Miriam’s relatives who has lived in Dallas for decades, and he was able to set us straight. Whew!

We made it home to have some quality time with the family before it was time to drop a number of them off at the airports. Miriam’s cousin was first, since she was leaving out of DFW airport, and then we had some time before we had to drop off her mother and brother, so we went in search of an easy place to eat dinner with our large clan. We finally settled on a Mexican place called Fuzzy's Taco Shop since it was the only eatery by the Love Field airport. None of us could get past the idea of an actual fuzzy taco and we totally expected it to be a gross place to eat, but it ended up being excellent and quite affordable!

The few of us remaining then headed back to Beth and Daniel’s house for one more relaxing night with them. The next day we packed up our things, grabbed coffee at the local Barnes & Noble where I was able to stalk a music manager I’ve spoken with a number of times on the phone, and then Miriam and her dad drove me to the airport. 

Back to reality for me, and time to practice that piano before rehearsals start!