THE THIRTY MILE ZONE

Los Angeles, CA

(April 8, 2012)

We woke up on day two in Los Angeles to discover that the Easter Bunny had paid us a visit! Yay! Well, in truth, Miriam, the ever-prepared wonder, thought ahead and brought delicious chocolates from our favorite chocolatier in NYC, Jacques Torres, with a couple of traditional Hershey’s and Dove chocolate bunnies thrown in. The little sneak got up in the middle of the night to hide chocolate Easter eggs all over Sal’s apartment, and Sal and I, still dressed in our PJs, had fun finding them all on Easter morning. 

This day was going to be loads of fun, starting off with brunch with Sal and one of Miriam’s oldest friends, Rightor. Miriam and I, having watched a lot of TMZ, a paparazzi/entertainment based news program, wanted to hit up a brunch place often featured on the program called Toast, located in Hollywood. Apparently, it’s frequented a lot by celebrities. I wanted to go there, not for the possible celebrity sightings, but because I had seen it so often on TMZ that I had to check it out. 

Sal & the tea bag selections

Rightor & his coffee

Sal dropped us off and went to park the car, and we started catching up with Rightor while our table was prepared. Miriam and Rightor grew up together in New Orleans, and for a while we all lived in New York, but very recently, a television series he’s been writing garnered the interest of a major producer in LA, so he has “temporarily” relocated to LA to write more episodes in the hopes that a studio will pick it up. We’ll see how temporary that move is…
The brunch menu at Toast looked AMAZING! We all had a difficult time deciding what to get. Miriam and I settled on something sweet (pancakes and French toast covered and stuffed with all sorts of goodness), Rightor on something savory, and Sal, the skinny snot, couldn't decide, so he ate two meals to get a sweet AND savory fix!

My chai came with cookies!

We had a blast over brunch, chatting as though it hadn’t been a millennium since we’d last seen each other. We had a lot of laughs and a lot of fun, and I think we highly amused our waitress.

Once brunch was over, we said goodbye to Rightor, and Sal dropped us off on Hollywood Boulevard by the Grauman’s Chinese Theater (also know as Mann’s Chinese Theater). Miriam and I were going on the TMZ Hollywood tour, and we couldn’t have been more excited about it!

We got there a bit early for our tour, so we checked in at the tour booth and then played around with all the famous hand and foot prints that are pressed into the cement outside the Chinese Theater. As a tourist, you can’t have a real Hollywood visit without testing your hand and foot size against those of some of the most famous music and screen legends. At the same time, I can’t even imagine what has been in those handprints we were all so willingly touching…if you’re squeamish, bring some hand sanitizer.

Miriam matching up with Cher

Finally, someone with bigger hands than me! (Arnold Schwarzenegger)

AKA, my mom's side of the family

We also took some pictures of the Hollywood Walk of Fame, the many blocks of stars gracing the sidewalks around Hollywood Boulevard that idolize celebrities from musicians to television personalities, all the while trying to avoid the costumed characters wanting to take pictures with you for money. No, thanks.

Finally, it was time to join our tour!

Here’s a little back-story: TMZ is an entertainment news source, using both a website and a television show to promote the news of the entertainment world. Their television show takes place at their morning pitch meetings, where the TMZ employees pitch their stories to Harvey Levin, the creator of TMZ, in the hopes of getting the stories posted on the website. I absolutely LOVE watching these morning pitch meetings. They are ridiculous and hilarious. Personally, I could care less about the videos and pictures they get of the various celebrities-- I’m more interested in watching the camaraderie of the employees. I find it so entertaining that I actually DVR it so I can make sure to watch it every day.

Anyways, TMZ stands for “Thirty Mile Zone,” a term from the 1960’s, which meant that any film shooting outside this zone was considered a location shoot-- location shoots require per diems and paid travel and living expenses, so to film within this thirty mile zone was cost effective and ideal for producers. The Thirty Mile Zone basically sits on top of the center of Hollywood. Harvey Levin thought it would be a fun throwback to name his entertainment news website after the Thirty Mile Zone, since a lot of their news comes from, but it’s not limited to, Hollywood.

So, Miriam and I were super pumped to be going on the relatively new TMZ Hollywood tour (it was less than a year old when we went). It’s different from your typical sight-seeing tours because the tour guides are TMZ employees and could even be one of the people you see on the television show, and rather than point out the expected LA sights, they point out where celebrity happenings have occurred (i.e. the corner where Hugh Grant picked up the prostitute or the Laugh Factory where Michael “Kramer” Richards had his racial rant), all while scoping for celebrities. 

Van!

We were really hoping our tour guide would be Van, the young black guy from Louisiana often featured on the show. We were so hoping it would be him that we decked ourselves out in New Orleans and Saints t-shirts. And wouldn’t you know, our tour guide was Van! 

We let him know right away that we were going to be a fun pair, but it looked like the rest of the people on the bus were going to be quiet and unresponsive. I decided right then and there to make up for that. I was joking with him and trying to give clever answers to his questions and even tried to get the other people on the bus involved. They were boring. But at least I was entertaining myself and Van. Miriam just shook her head and laughed at me.

The tour is in a big, open-air van. Well, bigger than a van but smaller than a full-sized bus. It has a roof but no windows, just giant open spaces that we could hang out of if we felt adventurous—ah, the glories of living in a desert without the real worry of rain. We could see everything around us without the hindrance of windows but still kind of be out of the sun. That was sweet.

Our friend Lori had gone on the TMZ tour the month prior so she let us know that they’d ask for volunteers for games along the way, with the potential to win a free t-shirt. Well, I wanted that t-shirt. The minute Van started saying the word “volun-” my hand shot up in the air. The game I played was whether or not the celebrity in the video would wave at the camera or give the finger. The whole bus thought my celebrity would give the finger, but I said he would wave. And guess who was right? That’s right, baby. I’m the proud owner of a TMZ Hollywood tour t-shirt. Boo-yah. I won’t tell you who my celebrity was in case you, reader, end up on this tour and happen to get the same celebrity video. No cheating!

We ended up playing the game twice more and both contestants got it wrong, so in an effort to give away his last t-shirt, Van asked everyone where he was originally from. I was the first to answer, but since I already had a t-shirt I couldn’t win again.

The tour cracked Miriam and I up. We stopped by all sorts of crazy places, including the hospital where celebrities are born, go crazy, and die, the Hollywood precinct, which has a special rule in place where they won’t release mug shots (celebrities, if they are going to be arrested, hope to be in the Hollywood precinct at the time of their arrest…), various restaurants celebrities frequent when they want to be seen (like Boa), and an apartment building with some very famous inhabitants (like Elton John, for instance, who has a separate apartment for his baby…because the baby can take care of itself, right?).

Surprise carrot cake!

Van, who was mic’ed the whole time, would start up conversations with people on the street or in the cars next to us when we were stuck in traffic. At one point he started up a conversation with the couple in the car next to us, asking what they were doing for their Easter Sunday, at which point the lady lifted an unexpected carrot cake from her lap! WTF?! Where did that come from?? We had fun with that one. 

We only had one brief celebrity sighting—Wayne Brady—as he waited to be seated at a brunch place Van was pointing out to us. Van then told us how he has some bad blood for Wayne Brady after Wayne’s production company optioned his screenplay about Hurricane Katrina and then never did anything with it. It’s what brought Van to LA in the first place. He may be slightly bitter about it, but he’s now a celebrity in his own right. Shoot, the guy was invited into the back of Cee-Lo’s limo when they both showed up at the same fast food joint. Cee-Lo recognized him from TMZ and asked him to join him in his car! He said it was wild eating his value combo in Cee-Lo Green’s limo. Pretty funny stuff.

One of my favorite moments was when we passed by the Chinese Theater (remember the costumed characters I mentioned earlier?). On the count of three he had us all say hi to Spongebob, who happily turned toward our bus and waved. Then Van had us watch a video where that very Spongebob got beat up by two women who thought he said something disparaging about one of their mothers. It was the perfect set up. We were so happy and then completely mortified. It was hilarious! Trust me, it was hilarious.

Then, sadly, the tour came to an end. We, happily, gave Van a nice tip (always tip your tour guides!) for the very entertaining tour we took and asked him to take a picture with us outside the tour bus. My reaction to the picture (“Sweet, wounded...That’s beautiful.”) sent him into hysterics, at which point he hugged us both and told us he loved us. Aw.

After the tour, we ventured into various shops along Hollywood Boulevard until Sal could come pick us up, then we all went to the West Hollywood It’s a Wrap (yes, again) since Miriam and I only had 15 minutes there the day before. Sal had never been and really wanted to check it out.

I totally scored at this It’s a Wrap, finding two perfectly fitting pairs of dress pants from the television show “Brothers and Sisters” and the Adam Sandler movie Jack and Jill. I also found a really nice dress shirt for my brother (it was his birthday in a week, after all), and a pair of stainless steel hoop earrings from the Selena Gomez television show “Wizards of Waverly Place” that only cost 90 cents. 90 cents! Total steal.

My fried burrito

The fun cactus chandelier

After we drained It’s a Wrap dry, we headed back to Sal’s apartment to freshen up, randomly running into a friend of his driving by and convincing her to chat for a second in a convenient parking lot-- LA really is a small town sometimes! Then we met up with Sal’s friend, Isabella, for dinner at the Mexican restaurant Don Cuco, where I got an amazing fried burrito. Dinner was a blast and Isabella was so much fun.

By the end of the evening we were so tuckered out by our long and eventful day that we couldn’t wait to pass out...but not before having some Easter Bunny chocolate...

Sal, Isabella, and Miriam outside Don Cuco's

IT'S A WRAP

Los Angeles, CA
(April 7, 2012)

We woke up relatively early on our first official day in Los Angeles, partly because we were still on New York time so our brains believed it was three hours later, and partly because we scheduled brunch plans with a friend of ours.

We got ourselves ready, waved goodbye to Sal as he headed off to work at Soul Cycle, a popular New York-based spinning studio, and headed out to Hollywood to meet our friend Lori.

Lori was originally a friend of Miriam’s sister, Beth, but because of our mutual interest in show business, we three had become close, so it was a no-brainer to meet up with her during our stay in LA.

We agreed to meet at The Hudson, a bar/eatery in Hollywood and, conveniently, walking distance from Lori’s apartment. Well, walking distance for a girl like Lori who used to live in Boston and walked everywhere-- a proper LA person would NEVER walk anywhere, or so she told us. Side note: We also, amusingly, discovered how unwilling people are to travel from neighborhood to neighborhood, especially our NYC friends who should have been used to a lot of travel time getting from place to place, but, no, having to travel over 20 minutes somewhere was a bit out of everyone’s comfort zone. That amused us.

Anyway, we, luckily, found street parking right outside the restaurant, went inside, and found Lori waiting for us at a table. Everything on the menu looked delicious, but we were so busy catching up that it took us a while to place our order. Near the end of the meal, Lori pointed out that the restaurant was actually built up around a couple of 50-foot -plus trees, meaning that, literally, there were trees growing in the restaurant. How in the world did we miss that?? Especially the giant tree. Across. From. Our. Table. Doh!

Lori, Miriam, me, and the tree

Our meal came to an end but we weren’t ready to say goodbye to Lori just yet, so we kidnapped her. Obviously. Actually, it was pretty easy to convince her to come with us. All we had to do was tell her we were on our way to a shop in Burbank called It’s a Wrap, a consignment shop used by the movie/television studios. Everything in the shop was purchased for and/or used in television shows and films, and each item has a tag with a code telling for which studio or, more specifically, which show it was purchased. Once the studios no longer need the costume item, they sell it to It's a Wrap on consignment, and people like us can purchase them for cheap and then have the honor of saying, "These pants were used in [insert movie title here]."

We were having a field day perusing the merchandise and figuring out the various codes. I ended up finding a steal of a deal! A Zara trench coat used in “General Hospital”, originally retailing for $200, was on “winter” clearance (because in LA, a spring trench coat is considered a winter coat...*ahem*) for $30! A ridiculous steal! I was super excited because I had been looking for a cute spring trench coat, and this one practically fell in my lap!
We finally exhausted ourselves and made our purchases. I ended up scoring not only the trench coat but also a scarf for my mom from the short-lived television show “Detroit 1-8-7” and a beautiful tie for my brother from the reincarnated television show “Melrose Place”. Miriam walked away with a cute summer dress from the Warner Bros. Studio, stellar earrings used in The Green Hornet, and amazing, sparkling black heels from 21 Jump Street. I can’t remember at all what Lori ended up getting, but we were all really happy with our purchases.

Bob Odenkirk

After dropping Lori off at her apartment, we headed down to Sunset Boulevard to hit up my favorite—and the world’s largest—independent music shop in the world, Amoeba Music. We originally discovered Amoeba Music when visiting San Francisco in 2006, and when we drove down to LA later that same trip, we made sure to visit their Hollywood store. It’s a huge warehouse-sized store with new and used CDs, DVDs, LPs, and memorabilia. On my last visit I found a very hard to find import title by one of my favorite artists, Keri Noble, for über cheap (plus a ton of other music that filled up a good portion of my carry-on luggage…). This time around we searched for all our favorite artists, couldn’t find anything we didn’t already have, and headed to the classical and musicals sections instead. Jackpot! We loaded up on a bunch of used operas and musicals, and I even found the recording for Cirque du Soleil’s Wintuk—which is only available through Cirque—for one-third the price. Woo hoo!
At this point a charity auction started up at the store’s main podium, led by comedian/actor Bob Odenkirk, so we amused ourselves for a while listening to him auction off crazy and stupid things. It was fun. Then it was time to check out, and the cashier loaded us up with free bumper stickers, magnets, and hipster pins. We were golden!

The mural outside the building.

Going to In-n-Out Burger is required when visiting LA…or so we like to believe. Our appetites being ravenous, we decided to get the required visit out of the way and searched for any In-n-Out Burgers in the area. Our search pulled up a plethora of In-n-Outs to choose from—you could practically throw a rock and hit three at once. So we picked the easiest one to get to and had one heck of a time trying to park in their ridiculously built parking lot (you would think a city filled with drivers would have better parking lots...you would be wrong). The place was crazy crowded, but we managed to snag a table and enjoyed our quick bite to eat.

                

Inside Aroma

Having nothing else planned that afternoon, we decided to hit up the other It’s a Wrap store, located in West Hollywood. It was farther than we anticipated, so we only had 15 minutes to look around before they closed, but I was able to find a brand-spanking-new Drew Brees Saints jersey for Miriam for only $9 from the Warner Bros. Studio—it still had the tags on it! Then we hit up a nearby Target to get a few things we needed for our stay and headed back to Sal’s apartment in the not-so-bad rush hour traffic.

Back at Sal’s apartment we freshened up and prepared to meet up with my little cousin, Autumn, who moved out to LA right after she graduated from high school a few years ago. We rarely get to see each other anymore—it’s rare that we’re all at home in WI at the same time—so it was a nice treat to be able to see her on our trip.
We met at one of her favorite hang-outs in Burbank called Aroma Coffee & Tea Company, a cute little café offering a wide variety of teas and coffees, as well as amazing looking desserts and a fabulous array of savory dishes. Miriam and I settled on a fresh hummus platter and a beautiful salad, and the three of us grabbed a table in Aroma’s ultra-cute backyard, where we chatted about life and waxed philosophical before we all started getting tired.
After saying our goodbyes, we headed back to Sal’s, camped out in his living room chatting, and then hit the hay. We had a big day on the morrow-- a TMZ tour awaited us!

Me with my cousin Autumn

My favorite table at Aroma